Grace in the Chaos

“You are now pronounced husband and wife”…. these words are something I had anticipated hearing for many years and now it was here. We are married, a new family established. The Lord defiantly has His hand in this relationship and marriage from the very start. Bob and I have been together for almost 7 years and nothing could have prepared us for the way our marriage began. We had an amazing wedding. It flew by faster than I thought possible, especially when I think of the 16 months of planning that was put into it. We then left and went to Montego Bay, Jamaica on amazing honeymoon. What an amazing start to a great marriage. However, nothing could have prepared me for what happened on the 9^th day of our marriage. Bob and I after getting back from Jamaica were able to be a part of our dear friends’ wedding in Orlando and then spend two more days with our family before the big move to North Carolina. On Monday we began the long haul to NC, which takes approximately 10 hours. While driving I realized that once we got outside of Atlanta my right leg was cramping. I called Bob who was in his car and said let’s stop at Starbucks before we get to South Carolina. We stopped and when I got out of the car I realized my right leg and foot were swollen, which was weird that had never happened before. We debated what it could be and then I just thought maybe it is from driving and traveling so much all I have been doing is sitting. As we continued to drive it got worse and worse and more painful. By the time we got to Greenville, SC about halfway our parents were worried and wanted us to go to an urgent care or ER. I defiantly did not want to go to the hospital thinking this will get better when we get home and I will prop it up over night then it will go away. We keep driving anf get almost to Charlotte, NC and stop at a rest area, which we had been doing every hour since we left Greenville, SC, and I could barely get out of the car let alone walk. I was really scared and thinking this may blood clot just like my sister-in-law (an EMT) and my mother-in-law were saying. This freaked me out, I just finished nursing school and it wasn’t like the last 100 miles this thought had not crossed my mind along with worst case scenarios. So there we are at a rest stop about 2 ½ hours from our new home. I was very upset all I could think is what are we going to do I don’t have insurance we can’t go to the ER we will never be able to pay that back and we just got married. So after negotiating with Bob and our very worried parents, which was not smart, I said we are in two cars so let’s just get to our apartment and then we will go to Wake Med in Cary. So 12 ½ hours after leaving Albany, and in a lot of pain along with a right leg that is twice the size of the other and a flip flop that no longer fits my foot we pull in at our apartment and park then I get in Bob’s car to go to the ER. Now I am terrified I can barely walk and the pain is unbearable. We go into the ER register then sit down and in 3 minutes they call me back. We get to triage I answer a few questions and then next thing I know we are in a room with an ER doctor. I knew from experience that service this quick means it is really bad. So after being seen by 3 ER doctors they diagnosed me with a blood clot but said they could not confirm it until the morning. Then they told us you should not be here this is very serious and you may even experience a fatal complication tonight. So I was crying Bob was crying all I could think we have only been married 9 days and I am only 22 years old this can’t be happening to us we just got off our honeymoon! And of course when Bob call our parents we ddin’t mention the fatal part this was bad enough news. So they kept me overnight in the ER version of an ICU. I swear Bob didn’t sleep every time I woke up (thanks to the morphine I got a little rest) he was awake in the recliner watching me, so needless to say we were both scared and worried. They did the scan in the morning and found the clot went from my groin to my ankle. They placed me on Coumadin and Lovenox shot immediately. We had a few visitors, which was great and encouraging especially since we hardly know anyone here and our family and friends are so far away. My parents came in that next night late and Bob finally went home and got some sleep. I was in the hospital two days. I must say going home was weird for one thing it was mine and Bob’s apartment we went home to and coming home form your honeymoon and spending the first night in your apartment with your parents there was not what I had expected at all! However, I was so grateful for them being there. They helped out so much and we couldn’t have done without them. Also, having a dear and sweet family, who as known Bob since practically birth, live right up here just a mere 7 minutes away from our house is so comforting. They have blessed in so many ways. When my parents left Bob’s mom stayed with us for a week, which was also a blessing and huge help not to mention I truly enjoyed spending time with her. God has truly provided. Bob had to return to work the day after I was put in the hospital and He totally provided people to care for me and help with the house and food. It was so hard because I just didn’t know how this would all work out but of course He has shown Himself faithful thought this entire process. I am finally off of the Lovenox shots and they say my Coumadin is at an appropriate level so now we just wait, wait for the blood thinners to do their job and my body to absorb the clot. The most difficult thing throughout this has been the pain. The pain medicine take the edge off but pain medicine it made to work of nerves and this it a blood flow issue. Sometime I can’t sleep which is the worst. Also the loneliness, yes people call to check on me and drop by but most of the time I am by myself, unable to really leave my apartment and it is difficult but honestly in this I have found great comfort in the time I am spending with God and His word. I as well truly miss fellowship with our church, especially now, but I know that the Lord will provide a church here for us to grow, fellowship and serve in when I am well. I must say that through this I have seen now more than ever that God has blessed me with an amazing husband. I could not ask for more he goes above and beyond. He has done so much and even learned to cook! I have the good days and the bad days but the Lord has seen me through them. Bob and I are learning a lot about faith and dependence on God especially as the bills have started to arrive. God will provide, we know this and we trust Him for it but it doesn’t mean it isn’t a struggle daily even hourly. I will continue praise him through this trial we are going through for we are not alone and He is able!